In my head.

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Why can’t I run out of things to say? The never ending rhymes of a live action play.

A thought comes to mind, I shove it back in, then that triggers more, a brain frenzy spin.
I hear quite a lot about compartmentalizing thoughts.
Arrange a place in your brain for your triggers to stay. File them in line and then store them away.
Listen though, that takes mental self-discipline, my conscience is strong and to me she ain’t listenin’.
She comes and she goes
Bouncing shoulder to shoulder. She feeds off my fears, for she’s the beholder.
She can access a space so deep in my head, she’s my own search engine to my personal dark web.
So how do I find her, arrange her, confine her? How do I get to her center, when I can barely define her!

If you can imagine it, inside my head,stuck
this little Anchor me, at my News desk. Reading the words scrolling across the screen,
thinking to herself, this girl needs to scream.
But jibberin’ and jabberin’, her mouth doesn’t stop, winning every argument, and shutting people up.
Rethinking decisions
Reconsidering ambitions
She’s good and she’s brave but if I let her, she’s vicious.

So what if I imagined her in another type of way.. not a rambling News Anchor, but my therapist per se. Instead of word scrambling she creates the clean slate. She could be the light bulb to my darkened pathway. She’s happily and gracefully arranging in there, so to organize my thoughts, she files them with care.stickman-thing-gears-bulb-idea-stickmen-white-background-45174938

We’ll steer this ship together, in this mind-awakening raging sea. She’ll hold her own in these waves though they’re deep. Because she’s also behind the good things I do, and if i’d just let her, she’d be my drive too.
See it’s a battle back and forth, literally right behind my eyes, and if it’s not my friend, this brain could be my own demise.

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Thanks for stopping by! – Steph

 

Feature photos from google.

Published by stephanieroath3157

Your girls gotta write that dark poetry ya'll🖤😜🖤

19 Replies to “In my head.”

  7. That is what this world does. It makes you question your own mind. You are the captain of your ship and you should steer through the raging sea. That is what O’Captain My Captain is all about. Most let someone else steer their ship so the Captain is found dead. You are a very gifted poet. Keep it up.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thank you for reading! And Yes to everything you just said! I control this ship because I control this sea! Also, the fact that you just called me a poet made me blush ☺️ Such a compliment! Especially coming from you! Thank you!♥️♥️

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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